Expressive shapes, great fluidity, a lot of care for detail, but I'd recommend slightly more textures on the characters for I think that'd fit well with the already rich colors, light/shadows and lines. In fact, think the light/shadows and details of the backgrounds and illustrations could be toned down a bit so not to distract from the animation, so you could reallocate that workload to the textures, I guess.

Also, good job on the dynamism of some scenes like Hogstrong sliding down the root or Cutie creating the goo monster, pretty cool.

Well, think some smooth transitions between poses would've been nice, since I think it would fit well with your style full of smooth lines and vibrant colors, think your style is vivacious, idk. I'd suggest toning down the brightness slightly even, 'cause I think that distracts a little bit from your shapes and I think those are more expressive. Great textures though, they have a proper ammount of detail, I feel.

I also liked the tridimensionality from many parts, e.g. the characters' hair, Natz' head piece or the square, metal creature.

The plot of the video was cute but the slow, text format really hurts the drama/pacing imo (which I surmise was intentional for readability but still...I'd recommend different speeds at times for effect, sacrificing a little readability on purpose just for it). Indeed I think the slow, informative pace goes in a very different direction than your vivacious style; although I do think the music, sfx and background movement are cohesive with it.

The darker shade of the background contrasts well with the brightness of the characters too, imo (part of the reason I suggested to tone it down only slightly).

And maybe some voice-acting would fit well, again because of the vivacity of your style. And maybe a little bit of action, just a little would already fit very well, I think.

Hope the game's development has been going well, I liked design decisions from the EBF series. Peace.

IMO, the shapes of the bodies of your characters seem to call too much attention to themselves (long arms and legs).

Really liked the shapes with a lot of smoothness and straightness and the limited choice of color, both of which I think work together for a simple aesthetic that's pleasing to my eyes by demanding less focus on detail (exception being the intricate pattern on the text box but I think it's fine since it's on a separated area, close to the text. I'd still say it has a different visual appeal but I'm thinking on the whole here).

I also really appreciated the symbolism constructed from many uses of visual effects and a number of sound effects (e.g. the heartbeat or the moment of rage during the reunion with the mother, or the series of camera flashes also on the reunion), that was a nice device of communicating/expressing many different things on different parts (emotions, ideas, events...). There were also sfx with less symbolism and merely realism, like the bell ring at the store or the car drift when the deer appears, they were nice and all but just trying to make clear what are the ones I'm talking about here.

The "photography" was also very nice (as in the angles you portrayed the images, lol), I thought they were in general clear and representative/meaningful, many of them could have worked well if this was a comic, IMO. The smooth and varied/deliberate image transitions also complemented this and in a way befitting of your chosen media.

I also liked how the color limitation, the very subtle image filter and the music often worked together, I'd say. On the first and last parts of the visual novel the slower rhythm and "isolated" notes (as I'd describe it) + the color and filter evoked in me feelings of sadness; the filter + the faster paced song on the scene preceding the reunion evoked something of turmoil/unease/anxiety; and the stretched out notes + filter + color evoked something of relief and sadness on the hotel scene. Speaking of the music, it also evoked in me the notion of something delicate (like feelings, which matter a lot in this story, let's just say) in the title screen in conjunction with the pattern.

I think the introspective 1st person narration was a good fit for this story, including the narrator's personal views and value judgements. Speaking of writing, the different small sounds for when either Clara or her mother was talking was a nice touch.

And finally, let me say why I'm not voting 5/5. On the funeral scene, after the baby starts crying, Clara smiles to herself; considering the funeral context, the whole mood stablished by the song and story so far and everything, it felt really out of place to me, as if she was enjoying the couple's misfortune sadistically for no clear reason (or at least that's what I thought at first); my guess is that it was intended as some brief comic relief, if that's the case any additional clues to stablish contrast or something would've helped IMO, a brief stop in the music as the baby cried louder and then a quick chuckle animation played out, some short remark in addition to "I smiled to myself" in the narration, just anything to prevent a misinterpretation.

A somewhat similar thing happened when Clara smiles during the otherwise heartbreaking phone call when her mother says "Okay then. It'll be nice to see you."; it was kinda subtle and I could understand if that's just showcasing the joy of her mother saying those words, so it didn't bother me as much, but I might as well mention it also as feeling out of place (maybe I'd suggest have it as a quick smiling animation before returning to the frown, idk).

One last thing, I felt like the ending was cut too short, either there could've been some more tension build up before Clara gets to the stand, or maybe the way her relatives react to her speech could've been shown (even if they wouldn't react much, like her brother on a previous scene), or maybe the story could've ended with Clara's lament and reminiscence of her father on the hotel room...it's almost as if it ended on a cliffhanger (specially when her father used to give out good speeches) since so much of the story's conflict lies on the way Clara and her close ones relate and treat each other and we are left without knowing how'd that go after the speech. Would they approve her speech despite everything else? Would their attitudes to Clara's life choices tarnish their views on her contribution? Etc. Think you could either give us that or build up some tension a bit before if her presence there was the thing in itself you wanted us to focus on.

That was basically why the 4.5/5 (I mean, still great, right?), now I just want to mention some things extra. Think you could've made either the visuals have more details or the text box pattern have less and much of what I said would still be achieved (if adding more details maybe a more descriptive writing would also be a good fit, think it'd be possible without sacrificing the introspection). Don't think any of these would've been better or worse than how you made it or than each other, but I just wanted to share these ideas for...options for next time? Reflections on the work process? I don't know, hope it's useful, lol.

Well anyway, thank you for making this and may good tides come about in your life story and this review got so long @_@

Very cute game!

I think the amount of colors and of details in the shapes, plus limited use of lines and lights/shadow work together for a cohesive and simple aesthetic (which I could guess that was your vision, if that's the case, bonus points).

I'm impressed by the smoothness of animations and camera movements, made for a very pleasant visual experience to me.

I also liked the soft/relaxed mood of the song yet aluding to the western/cowboy theme through the instruments and melody, I believe.

The cereal boxes buildings were also a cute idea, heh.

I thought it was fun to shoot the enemies in slow motion as if conveying the toast shoots with the speed of a gunslinger (I've seen that in other games before but the implementation here was well done and fits well with the game IMO without being cliché or anything).

My beef with this game is that I felt a number of shapes lacked smoothness, specially at the beginning and end cutscenes, which felt purposeless, uncohesive (including with simplicity) and a bit unpleasant to look at, for me.

The stages could have a bit more of variety also IMO, in background, colors, theme, etc, the train one was a good exception.

And I could have appreciated some lore into the bandits, one small cutscene or clue in the stage would be enough, anything to explain why they caged the dude's sweets (I surmise that's the link between them and the initial cutscene?). I guess there was a bunch of pro-cereal propaganda in the buildings, which could mean that was their motivation; when I first played I thought the bandits probably were occupating the place illegally rather than own it so maybe the problem was on my end, but I hope all of this is still helpful feedback, anyway.

By the way, good choice on the words' font, aluding to western movies posters(?) but "Los Tostadores *here* to save..." instead of "are here" felt like a needless typo rather than some casual/relaxed use of language (unlike "went zzz" at one of the ending cutscenes).

Also, small stuff, I believe some small elegant details could add a bit of clarity while maintaining the simple aesthetic (e.g. on the bed on one of the endings, is the white a pillow?).

Well in any case, nice job! It was a really fun game, looked like a lot of care was put into it and I saw it in the things I praised. If you guys enjoyed making it, make more! Thank you for your work!

IMO the audio and the tone of voice sounded detached and devoid of sentiment for a poem about love and longing in content. Perhaps the intent was to idealize the sentiment/relationship and convey it was transcendent or ineffable? But to me the sentiment itself was missing, maybe it was too idealized, imo.

The use of vocabulary was eloquent, though, and the consonances and assonances helped create a pleasing effect. I also thought the vocabulary helped create an alienating effect alongside the audio, but again, not alongside the content.

I'd suggest changing the content to create an abstract experience or changing the audio/tone to convey more emotion. You could possibly add rhyme and/or meter if you'd lean to the romantic side, but I'd advise against if you'd go for the esoteric, I think lacking them (the way it is) helps with that.

Anyway, these are my thoughts.

Really liked the choice and placement of the sound effects, think they both established moods and built tension well while maintaining clarity. I also loved the intonations on the voice acting, really made the characters feel alive and displayed well their attitudes, imo; also everyone was well articulated.

There was a lot of focus on the radio show at one point instead of Sam, who I see as a richer character and the intended focus (if I interpret correctly); perhaps more comments from him was a good deal? Or maybe more frequently, or maybe he reacts mid-show to something in the traffic jam, anything to keep focus on him could be good, possibly, imo.

Also, loved the "D-d-d-d-d-did you know?", hehe.

Cool stuff, a lot was left unexplained but I imagine it'll come in future episodes, naturally. I don't know the rest of the plot but I hope to listen more to the characters around Sam, like Celine or Gabe, etc, 'cause I think they can add more color without detracting the story from the character. Anyway, good job!

I liked the construction of the narrative and the bluntness/concision of many characters, though I felt Brooks had an overly repetitive tone at times, sadly, I've perceived him more emotionally invested than the performance let out. And I think the ending could've had a smoother flow of tension (a slower buildup to the climax and/or a slower/longer denouement), considering how much information was laid out before. But I was thrilled by the dynamics of the characters and enjoyed the little jokes between Brooks and the Narrator. Good job! :)

Efficient porn, the colors, tridimensionality, detailed textures and use of light/shadows produces realism and arousal, but that distracts me from and leaves little room for things like your shapes (e.g. the hands' and faces', the hair's) that show more personality IMO, which I think is better.

I liked the curves and smoothness of your shapes and the shades of color you used (and/or the filter if that's what it is?) but I think the use of hatching for light/shadows and textures doesn't fit well with it because I think it steals a bit of attention from the things I mentioned, would've appreciated other techniques for these details (like just filling the shades with dark color or drawing the minute details for textures, etc). Exceptions are the hatching with gray lines on the handcuffs and white ones on the hair, think those are subtle enough imo.

But your colors are so good. And irregularities on your lines also fit well I think, now that I payed more attention to them. And I think the background was a good choice, straighter lines and the black contrasting with your curves and the yellow/orange to create contrast and emphasis on Noelle, nice stuff.

Also, she looks cute to me and that works well with the colors and shapes, I think.

Overall good stuff, thanks for making this.

Great tridimensionality, though I find the emphasis on the manic face with the effect of guiding the viewers eyes to it a bit cliché. I'd suggest to guide just through her body, maybe ending on her arm, but the focus on this face like that feels a bit forced to me.

Also good use of light/shadows, liked the colors (think could've also worked with one or two more sharing predominance with the orange, by the way) and I think there was room for more textures though the way it is looks great too; just some ideas.

That's it, great job!